The Secret of Shame and Silence: How to Attain Peace of Mind and True Lineage
Lesson No. 1 | Wednesday, Parashas Kedoshim, 26 Nissan 5755
In-depth study of the Gemara is the only remedy for preserving one's sanity and intellect. The more a person attains true knowledge, the more shame increases upon his face. Shame and silence in the face of an insult are the clear signs of a person's pure lineage and that the root of his soul stood at Mount Sinai.
To transform from being "mes" (dead) to "emes" (truth), a person must integrate himself with all the souls of Israel. As long as a person believes that he is the greatest tzaddik, that he is the best Chassid, and that there is no one like him in all the land—he remains in the category of "dead." The word "emes" is formed only when one adds the letter Aleph—representing the Alufo shel Olam (Master of the Universe)—and the integration with the collective. This is the intention behind the reading of the Shema: "Hear O Israel, Hashem is our God, Hashem is One"—to integrate with all the souls of Israel, with all the tzaddikim of the generation, regardless of whether one is Breslov or not. What does it matter? If a Jew wrote a book that strengthens me in emunah (faith) and bitachon (trust), that awakens me to the love of Hashem, I must learn from it. It is not my job to judge who has a portion in the World to Come; my job is to take any book that will help me enter the World to Come.
The Fire of Gevuros in the Heart
Rebbe Nachman teaches that the root of Gevuros (severities) is in the heart. The peak of the Sefiros is Netzach she'b'Gevurah (Eternity within Severity), and these severities manifest as shame and weeping. As it is stated: "My heart grew hot within me; as I mused, a fire burned; I spoke with my tongue" (Tehillim 39:4).
When the heart begins to burn from within, a person becomes one who "speaks truth in his heart." He begins to feel his own flaws, his distance from holiness. He says to himself: "Where am I, and where is the truth? I am the worst of all. Even though I have drawn close to Chassidus, it still hasn't helped me by even a hairsbreadth; I fall every single day." This realization, this warmth in the heart and weeping, is the beginning of the tikkun (rectification).
Only the Gemara Preserves Sanity
The nature of the world is that a person gradually loses his clarity of mind over the years. From the age of twenty, a person begins to lose percentages of his intellectual power, and when he reaches the age of sixty, if he has not instilled the Gemara into his mind, he is liable to lose his sanity entirely. We have seen elderly people who lost their human dignity, speaking nonsense and cursing, because they lacked the anchor of the Torah.
In contrast, tzaddikim like Rabbi Levi Yitzchak Bender zt"l and Rabbi Shmuel Shapiro zt"l maintained wondrous sanity and clarity until their very last day. Only the Gemara can sustain the mind and prevent it from calcifying. Even great scientists and composers go mad and lose their minds, because external wisdoms do not build the soul. True intellect is found only in the study of the Gemara.
How does one build the mind? Not through a superficial run-through. One must take a page of Gemara, read it twice to understand the flow, and then analyze every word in Rashi, in Tosafos, and in the Poskim (Halachic authorities). If it is the Shulchan Aruch—one must study it with the Shach and the Sma, delving deeply into every word. "Mind" is the concept of ratzo v'shov (running and returning)—repeating the same line, the same Mishnah, over and over again. This is how one builds true knowledge.
Shame is the Light of Tefillin
When a person acquires a "mind" and true knowledge, he begins to understand where he truly stands. Until now, he was in a state of "casting his sins behind his back," oblivious to his condition. But when the intellect enters, shame enters. He becomes ashamed of the magnitude of his transgressions, of the filth of the sins that dull the heart.
Rebbe Nachman says that the more a person gains holy intellect, the more shame is added to him. This shame is the very light of the Tefillin. When a person rises at Chatzos (midnight prayer) and studies until morning in terrible shame, in lowliness, with a feeling of "How did the night pass me by?", this shame radiates upon his face. This is the secret of "and they will be afraid of you"—fear and shame are one and the same. Moshe Rabbeinu, whose face radiated light, was entirely filled with shame.
"One who commits a transgression and is ashamed of it—he is immediately forgiven for all his iniquities." Shame is the true forgiveness, and it is also what restores the intellect. One cannot acquire intellect merely through traveling and wandering; one needs the internal shame that stems from the study of Torah.
The Test of Silence and Lineage
How do we know if a person has noble lineage and a pure soul root? The Gemara in Kiddushin teaches us that the test is silence. When people argue and degrade one another, the one who remains silent is the one with true lineage.
"A family that is provoked by another family... and remains silent—this is a sign of noble lineage."
Rav went to Bavel and tested the lineages based on silence. If a person is insulted and remains silent, it is a sign that the feet of his ancestors stood at Mount Sinai. Conversely, one who possesses brazenness and speaks lashon hara (derogatory speech), it is a sign that there is a "trace of disqualification" within him. It is possible that some foreign element mixed into the family, some soul that did not stand at Mount Sinai. For the Jewish people who stood at Mount Sinai had their spiritual impurity removed, and this impurity is the brazenness and the evil speech directed at others.
Sometimes we see two families fighting with one another, and this is a kindness from Heaven to prevent them from marrying into each other, because "they do not allow him to cleave to his fellow." Hashem protects the pure souls through the dispute.
We must know that the entire issue of evil speech and viewing others negatively stems from the flaw of Kayin. Kayin saw guilt in everyone—in his father, in his mother, in his brother. He saw the entire world as flawed. The tikkun (rectification) is shame, silence, and humility. A Jew must possess shame, and this is the clearest testimony to his Judaism and his holiness.
Part 2 of 2 — Lesson No. 1