The daily chizuk from The Rav, Rabbi Eliezer Berland shlit"a — “Every woman can be like Queen Esther and Devorah the Prophetess”

“But among these there was not a man from those counted by Moshe and Aharon the Kohen, who counted the Children of Israel in the Wilderness of Sinai” (Bamidbar 26:64)

“And they said, each man to his brother: Let us appoint a leader and return to Egypt” (Bamidbar 14:4)

“We remember the fish that we ate in Egypt for free” (ibid. 11:5)

“And they will sprout from the city like the grass of the earth” (Tehillim 72:16)

Sunday, 19 Av 5783 — “Only the men cried out about what they were lacking in the desert; the women did not cry out”

These are his holy words:

It is written in Sefer Bamidbar that no woman was involved in any sin—neither the sin of the Golden Calf nor the other sins in the desert. A woman does not sin; the man is the one who sins. If the man does not cause her to sin, she will never sin.

Rashi says on the verse (Bamidbar 26:64) “But among these there was not a man”: upon the men there was a decree of death in the desert, but upon the women the decree of the spies was not decreed—because they cherished the Land. The men said, “Let us appoint a leader and return to Egypt,” while the women said, “Give us a portion of inheritance.”

What does “there was not a man” mean?

Not one man was saved from the decree of the spies. But upon the women the decree of the spies was not decreed. All the women lived—no woman died! There was no such thing as a woman dying!

The men complained every moment about every small problem: “Let us appoint a leader and return” (ibid. 14:4). There’s no water—let’s go back to Egypt. There’s no garlic… suddenly they don’t have garlic. It’s impossible to understand. Watermelon, fine—I understand; watermelon really is a bit expensive. But garlic and onions—over that you make an uproar and scream at Moshe? “Bring garlic! Bring onions! You’re not bringing us garlic!” It’s impossible to understand—worse than little children. Men who stood at the Giving of the Torah, at Har Sinai, want garlic? want onions? If it weren’t written, we wouldn’t be able to grasp it.

But only the men cried out about it—not the women: “We remember the fish that we ate in Egypt for free” (ibid. 11:5). They got fish for free?

They got sticks and whips for free—whips for free, sticks for free—not fish for free! Where do they hand out free fish? And in Egypt, of all places—did slaves have more? So what does “fish for free” mean?

The Chasam Sofer says that in Egypt the women would go to draw water, and the jugs would fill with fish. The way of the world is that when you go to draw water, the fish flee. Anyone who has ever drawn water from a river has seen that all the fish run away. But in Egypt it was the opposite—the fish jumped into the jugs. And all of this was only because of the women, because the women were righteous; the women did not agree to divorce.

The women said: There will be miracles, there will be wonders—and that is exactly what happened. The moment the Egyptians came to snatch the children, angels immediately arrived. The angels broke the windows of the houses, smashed everything, took the children out of the homes, and began running with them. The Egyptians, together with dogs, chased after the women so that the dogs would bite them—so they could seize and swallow the babies and the unborn. The dogs ran after them, and before the dogs could reach them, the babies were swallowed into the earth and were saved. The Egyptians brought plows to dig the babies out: “And they will sprout from the city like the grass of the earth” (Tehillim 72:16). “They will sprout from the city”—like grass; they would pop up like mushrooms after the rain.

No woman died in the desert, because a woman does not sin—only what others cause her to stumble in. Every woman can be like Devorah the Prophetess; it’s not only one woman every three thousand years. Devorah the Prophetess is every woman. Rabbi Nosson writes in Hilchos Milah 4 that every woman can be Queen Esther. Especially a kallah can be Queen Esther—she can reach the level of Queen Esther.

Mordechai strengthens Esther every day. A person must strengthen his wife every day. Every day, speak with her a little with words of Torah—tell her some saying from what he heard at Melaveh Malkah, a thought from the shiur. At every moment there is a new chiddush; every second there is a new chiddush. There was a shiur at Melaveh Malkah; in the morning there was a shiur.

The wife of On ben Peles said to him: Now you’re going against Moshe—I will not agree to this. A woman is more zealous than a man. If they cut off your peyos, woe to what the woman will do—the longer the peyos, the happier the woman is.

So upon the women there was no decree at all. Rashi says that no woman died in the desert—no woman passed away. The women lived out all their 120 years from the moment they were born.