Do Not Marry for Beauty, Honor

Before you is a summary of the topics from the daily lesson as delivered by our teacher, the Rav, Rabbi Eliezer Berland shlit"a – yesterday after the Maariv (evening) prayer, Sunday night, the 11th of Kislev 5786, Parshas Vayishlach:

1. At the end of Parshas Vayishlach, it is written regarding Basemath that she would burn incense (besamim) to idols. Yet, it is also written that his [Esau's] sins were forgiven [upon marriage], while regarding Ishmael's daughter, it says she was wicked. The answer lies in the reason why people marry—whether they marry for money or for honor.
2. As Rabbi Wolbe told me, it doesn't matter if the woman is maimed or mute; there is no problem with that [if the intentions are pure].
3. Beis Hillel says that if she "spoiled his dish" (burned his food), he may divorce her, and Rabbi Akiva says even if he found another more beautiful than her. The explanation is that if a man is willing to divorce his wife just because she burned his food or because there is a more beautiful woman, it is better that he actually divorces her [because the relationship lacks a true spiritual foundation].
4. Esau arranged the marriage so that Ishmael would kill Isaac, and then the verse "The days of mourning for my father are at hand; then I will slay my brother Jacob" would be fulfilled.
5. The Jews are the most "dangerous" nation in the world [in a spiritual and revolutionary sense]. They told Cyrus that if the city of Jerusalem is rebuilt, he should know he would lose his kingdom, as it is the most rebellious city in the world.
6. The secret of the number 728 (תשכ"ח) corresponds to the Holy Names—184 (קפ"ד) plus 144 (קמ"ד) equals 728. It was then, in the year 5728 (1967), that the Kotel (Western Wall) was liberated.
7. The woman is associated with Chochmah (Wisdom) and the man with Binah (Understanding).
8. As Rabbi Gershon Edelstein said, with the "wisdom" of the men, they made the Golden Calf, for the men tore off the nose rings and earrings from their ears. [The women refused], and therefore they received the holiday of Rosh Chodesh (the New Month).
9. The "Heichal HaBracha" (a Chassidic commentary) writes that Esau was a thousand times greater than Jacob [in potential]. He only needed the merit to nullify himself to Jacob. Just like Ahithophel, who was like an angel from the "fallen ones" (nephilim), but because he opposed the Tzaddik, he lost everything.
10. During the Six-Day War, we screamed out [in prayer] in the field; the police arrived. So we went to the Ponevezh Yeshiva and prayed there. At seven in the morning, they announced that all the MiGs (enemy fighter jets) had been destroyed. One must recognize all the miracles. Rabbi Shach said to leave the Land [of Israel], while Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky said to stay, so I left [Bnei Brak] for Jerusalem.
11. The Rebbe (Rebbe Nachman) says that one must know when to sleep. King David did not sleep or eat [excessively] because seventy years were donated to him [by Adam HaRishon], and therefore he utilized every single moment.
12. Everyone should study the third evening [of the week] regarding the laws of Berachos (blessings). All the girls should recite Tikkun Chatzos (the Midnight Lament) until next Sunday, which will be Chanukah; for those eight days, they should recite the short version of Chatzos. And they should study the Rashi commentary on Parshas Vayishlach, Vayetzei, and Toldos. For one who does not have a Yeshiva and can study until the morning, that is the best.