To Merit Doing Teshuvah Out of Love

An Awesome Prayer for the Month of ElulMaster of the World, Almighty One from Whom no purpose can be withheld, grant me the merit in this awesome month, the month of Elul, in which awesome dread and fear fall upon me, and my whole body trembles, and my knees knock against each other from the greatness of His awe. Grant me the merit that I may succeed in praying all my prayers within it with immense kavanah (intention), word by word, letter by letter, and that no letter shall leave me without intention. Please, Merciful and Gracious One, merit me in this month and throughout the entire year that I shall not see any forbidden sight, Heaven forbid, and that I shall not speak any lashon hara (evil speech) about any person in the world, and that I shall not be jealous of any person. Even if they humiliate me with all the humiliations and insults in the world, grant me the merit even then to rejoice in them with an exceedingly immense joy, as our Sages of blessed memory said: "Those who are insulted but do not insult, who hear their shame and do not respond, who act out of love and rejoice in suffering—about them the verse says: 'And those who love Him shall be like the sun going forth in its might.'"And may I merit in this awesome month of Elul to reach the level of Deborah the Prophetess, the "woman of torches," for at the time she would prophesy, torches were seen above her tent just as they were at the Giving of the Torah. Merit me, through the teshuvah (repentance) of this month—which is the beginning of the forty days that are a preparation for the Second Tablets—to receive them on Yom Kippur, and to be especially careful with the commandment of "Do not commit adultery." May I perform a complete teshuvah for all the forbidden sights that I saw and gazed upon, whether accidentally or intentionally, under duress or by will. Grant me the merit that I shall never again stumble into any forbidden sight for the rest of my life, and I shall sanctify my eyes with the ultimate holiness and purity. May I not be jealous of any person in the world, and may I merit to be like Rav Achai bar Yoshiya, who, in the merit of not being jealous of anyone, his bones did not rot, and he merited that his body remained whole even after his passing. And may I merit that which Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi merited, who, in the merit of learning Torah with everyone and bringing every person in the world close to Hashem, entered Gan Eden (Paradise) with his body. So too, may I merit, in the merit of the teshuvah I will perform in the month of Elul, to enter Gan Eden with my body.For the complete healing of Faigi bat Ora among the rest of the sick of Israel.B"sd 1243To merit doing teshuvah (repentance) out of love, to be meticulous in praying word by word with kavanah (intention), to accept humiliations with love, to sanctify the eyes completely, and not to be jealous of any person in the world.An Awesome Prayer for the Month of ElulMaster of the World, Almighty One from Whom no purpose can be withheld, grant me the merit in this awesome month, the month of Elul, in which awesome dread and fear fall upon me, and my whole body trembles, and my knees knock against each other from the greatness of His awe. Grant me the merit that I may succeed in praying all my prayers within it with immense kavanah (intention), word by word, letter by letter, and that no letter shall leave me without intention. Please, Merciful and Gracious One, merit me in this month and throughout the entire year that I shall not see any forbidden sight, Heaven forbid, and that I shall not speak any lashon hara (evil speech) about any person in the world, and that I shall not be jealous of any person. Even if they humiliate me with all the humiliations and insults in the world, grant me the merit even then to rejoice in them with an exceedingly immense joy, as our Sages of blessed memory said: "Those who are insulted but do not insult, who hear their shame and do not respond, who act out of love and rejoice in suffering—about them the verse says: 'And those who love Him shall be like the sun going forth in its might.'"And may I merit in this awesome month of Elul to reach the level of Deborah the Prophetess, the "woman of torches," for at the time she would prophesy, torches were seen above her tent just as they were at the Giving of the Torah. Merit me, through the teshuvah (repentance) of this month—which is the beginning of the forty days that are a preparation for the Second Tablets—to receive them on Yom Kippur, and to be especially careful with the commandment of "Do not commit adultery." May I perform a complete teshuvah for all the forbidden sights that I saw and gazed upon, whether accidentally or intentionally, under duress or by will. Grant me the merit that I shall never again stumble into any forbidden sight for the rest of my life, and I shall sanctify my eyes with the ultimate holiness and purity. May I not be jealous of any person in the world, and may I merit to be like Rav Achai bar Yoshiya, who, in the merit of not being jealous of anyone, his bones did not rot, and he merited that his body remained whole even after his passing. And may I merit that which Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi merited, who, in the merit of learning Torah with everyone and bringing every person in the world close to Hashem, entered Gan Eden (Paradise) with his body. So too, may I merit, in the merit of the teshuvah I will perform in the month of Elul, to enter Gan Eden with my body.