"And Why Were You Not Afraid to Speak Against My Servant Moses" - The Will of Rabbi Levi Yitzchak Bender zt"l Before His Passing

Rabbi Levi Yitzchak Bender zt"l, one of the great chassidim and rabbis of Breslov from the previous generation and a transmitter of the tradition from the servants of Hashem in Uman before World War II, delivered one of his last lessons with great self-sacrifice.

The lesson, which later became known as the will, was given on Thursday, the 19th of Sivan, 5749, Parshat Shelach, about a month before his passing. Rabbi Bender zt"l delivered the lesson at his home while he was in great weakness.

Rabbi Bender zt"l delivered the lesson against the backdrop of a fierce dispute and persecution against, the esteemed Rav Rabbi Eliezer Berland shlit"a. Rabbi Bender did not explicitly mention names, but those in the know understood his intention.

These are his holy words, the words of the will a few days before his passing.

"It is impossible to describe what our Rebbe would illuminate and influence us - if we would hold ourselves in unity."

"Regarding the spies, it is written: 'And Moses sent them by the word of Hashem,' Hashem commanded him to send! Moreover, it is said about them: 'All of them were men, heads of the children of Israel...' But when they saw that there, in Eretz Yisrael, they would not be leaders, and perhaps they indeed saw correctly that there they would not be leaders, they caused such a storm... that led the entire Israel to remain in the desert for another thirty-eight years."

"When they spoke about Eretz Yisrael, they essentially spoke against Hashem! On this, Caleb cried out: 'The land is very, very good, if Hashem desires us, He will bring us to this land, etc., but do not rebel against Hashem. And do not fear the people of the land for they are our bread, their protection has departed from them, etc. And the entire congregation said to stone them with stones.'"

"Every matter brought in the Torah - if it is a good thing, we must strive to learn from it for ourselves. And if it is not good, we must learn how far to distance ourselves from it."

"Rebbe Natan, before his passing, sighed greatly about simplicity and sincerity - whether he fulfilled the obligation of simplicity and sincerity of our Rebbe. He elaborated on this: 'The essence of simplicity - is a matter of truth!' When you tell something and there is truth in it, it is called simplicity and sincerity."

"If simplicity and sincerity are lacking - vitality is lacking! If truth is lacking - vitality is lacking!"

"The spies were indeed great men, perhaps they truly saw - they had eyes to see that there in Eretz Yisrael they would not be leaders! And because of this, they spoke against Eretz Yisrael, and troubles came."

"The saying attributed to Rebbe Natan z"l, was said by Rebbe Avraham b"r Nachman: 'We cannot imagine what we could have received - what our Rebbe would have given us - if we held ourselves together."

"A solitary person, even if he is a tzaddik and holy, but if he is alone - the tzaddik will not reveal himself to him as he can and as he should!"

"We cannot imagine what we would take from our Rebbe if we held ourselves together - if there was unity among us."

"Our Rebbe is indeed a tremendous light of truth, but he cannot reveal his light to us and give to us - because we do not hold ourselves together."

"Every blemish written in the Torah, even if it is written in severe and terrible language of prohibition or sin, nevertheless, something of it pertains to me as well. I must thoroughly examine myself and see if there is no trace of it in me, if there is nothing of it in me."

"The same is true regarding what is written about the greatness of the tzaddikim - we must interpret this for ourselves as well. Even if I cannot reach the level of the tzaddik, to this level of kedushah, but I can take something from it, I can take a 'scent' from it."

"Our Rebbe nevertheless said: 'The world should be amazed at the love that will be among my people'!"

"What does our Rebbe mean by this? The light of our Rebbe is so great and holy, such a true thing, and therefore everyone should have a yearning, that everyone should see only the good in the other. As our Rebbe said (Likutey Moharan Torah 34 Part 1) that everyone has a 'holy point'. And our Rebbe says further: 'that there dwells the holy love'."

"Such pride is permissible to have: 'I have a holy point where the holy love dwells'!"

"Even though ostensibly if a person sins, commits some blemish God forbid, it results in a breaking. But, our Rebbe says: that the breaking was only in the vessels, but the light itself remained above in the 'foundation of Atzilut'. And there was no breaking there."

"And why?"

"Because if the breaking had also extended to the light itself, there would be no possibility to do teshuvah."

"When a person commits some transgression, he becomes so broken (his vessels are broken). And if the point had also broken, then from where would he take the strength to do teshuvah?"

"On this our Rebbe said: No! You are not completely broken, even though there is a breaking in the vessels, but the 'light of kindness' itself, the 'holy love' itself still remains."

"And consequently: 'I am truly broken, my vessels are broken, but the love, the point where the love dwells, remains whole within me! And through it, I can return in teshuvah, I still have something to hold onto, some strength remains in me through which I can return in teshuvah."

"We need to talk about this a lot! Because sometimes a great time comes when one can merit something, and then immediately there is a 'change of opinions', meaning, something more than a 'change of opinions' already unfolds."

"Our Rebbe said: 'If the world knew how I teach derech eretz, the emperors would send their children to me so that I would teach them derech eretz'!"

"What is meant by derech eretz?"

"Simply, derech eretz is business dealings (Pirkei Avot - Torah is good with derech eretz), but 'derech eretz' includes many things. It encompasses love of Israel, love of tzaddikim.."

"And one must understand, our Rebbe teaches us specifically derech eretz?! Our Rebbe teaches us everything, so why did he seize upon the matter of derech eretz? It seems that derech eretz must be mixed into all things!"

"We spoke earlier of simplicity and sincerity, in this too, in everything there must be simplicity and sincerity. If one prays, it is very important if there is simplicity and sincerity, if there is truth - this is the vitality of the prayer, of everything."

"We are speaking here of the general, therefore the particular will emerge automatically, because the particular already emerges from the general. From every word, good particulars must emerge!"

"When I speak these things, I see that they do not understand at all what I mean. Even when I speak of the matter of 'opponents', they think: what does he want from us? Are we opponents?! But, Rebbe Avraham b"r Nachman nevertheless said this saying!"

"Every word our Rebbe said - is fulfilled! But, our Rebbe wants it to be more complete. Our Rebbe said: I have finished and I will finish. Our Rebbe finishes! Our Rebbe also said: I have won and I will win!"

"Just how much to finish? Everyone must see that our Rebbe will finish his way a lot!"

"We cannot speak so much of the particulars, because our matter was not to interfere in the matters of another, God forbid. We are only speaking of the general, and from the general, good particulars must emerge."

"It is true that this is certainly the honor of Hashem, and the will of our Rebbe z"l, and certainly our Rebbe has great and immense satisfaction above from those who travel to the grave and it results in a thought of teshuvah. But, the power of our Rebbe is so great that it could be much more beautiful, and it depends on whether we hold ourselves together - the unity!"

There is a saying from our Rebbe, and there are those who do not want to believe in this saying at all - 'I judge everyone favorably except for a person of dispute'!

Parshat Beha'alotcha - Aaron the Kohen and Miriam the prophetess spoke about Moses our Rebbe! They spoke harshly: 'Has Hashem only spoken through Moses? Has He not also spoken through us?' Terrible words, and Hashem did not flatter, but punished them!

"Miriam received leprosy, and it is brought that Aaron also became leprous, but he was immediately healed because he was a Kohen! What did they do already?"

They spoke lashon hara and this is called dispute - so they were immediately punished! A parsha in the Torah that Miriam became leprous and was outside the camp for seven days!

Both of them certainly intended truthfully in their thoughts, nevertheless - they caused a dispute, so they were punished! Is it a small matter that Miriam the prophetess was leprous for seven days? You spoke lashon hara about your brother, here is your punishment! "Miriam later returned to being Miriam, Aaron the Kohen returned to being Aaron the Kohen, but for this matter, Hashem punished them. Moses our Rebbe on his part is the same Moses our Rebbe, as it is written there: 'And the man Moses was very humble' - he was not angered by his disgrace (Rashi). Moses our Rebbe did not care, but Hashem was zealous for his honor, is this not Moses through whom the Torah passes.., and you speak against him?! And Hashem's anger burned." It was possible to argue in their favor and there was something to argue, but - you spoke against the tzaddik so they were punished. "So too regarding the saying of our Rebbe - what does it mean that he does not judge favorably? Not that he completely discards him, but for this wrongdoing, he does not judge him favorably! For this wrongdoing - for these words of lashon hara, you will have a punishment!" He punishes him immediately or he punishes him later, these calculations are made above. Certainly, it is possible to do teshuvah, Aaron immediately said: 'Please do not hold against us the sin we have foolishly committed and in which we have sinned'. When speaking on this subject, there are many who do not understand what is wanted from them: do we not believe in Hashem, do we not love each other? "May Hashem have mercy on us, do we not have a compassionate Rebbe, a compassionate leader! He does not want difficult things from us, our Rebbe judges everyone favorably. He said: 'Where there is a thought of teshuvah, it is taken from me'! And our Rebbe said in Torah 282: By judging favorably, it is possible to do teshuvah. Therefore, truly: 'Where there is a thought of teshuvah, it is from me', because he judges everyone favorably." And although we see that our Rebbe is such a compassionate leader, nevertheless, guard yourself - because for this, they do not remain silent! They punish for this matter! "Every word that comes from his holy mouth or from his students is true! And firm! And correct! And enduring! Even if ostensibly he is not speaking to me, is he not speaking to everyone, but I too am listening, so they mean me too!" "Our Rebbe brings in Sefer HaMiddot: 'When two tzaddikim disagree and do not agree in their opinion - one must know that one is in the aspect of plowing, he is plowing, and the other is in the aspect of harvesting, he is harvesting." "There are many things in which the tzaddikim do not get along and agree, our Rebbe says: 'Therefore, let no stranger interfere in their matters so as not to spoil the intention! The two tzaddikim know each other, one knows that the other is plowing and the other that he is harvesting. They know they do not get along and agree together - but, they know it is a complete matter together." Suddenly, a third party arrives who does not know what is happening here and interferes: let no stranger interfere in their matters so as not to spoil the intention! They asked Rabbi Levi Yitzchak Bender if these words are also true for the dispute that exists today among Anash. Rabbi Bender replied: "There are many words from our Rebbe that are so strong and uplifting and I need to take something from the word. When we speak, we cannot detail so much, because the adversary arrives and wants to spoil and thwart. And so, regarding our matter, we do not detail, we speak in a general way - the word is missing for me, and therefore I hear it.." "Our Rebbe says in Torah 5 Part 1, the first Torah of Rebbe Natan's closeness: 'An ear that hears the rebuke of life will lodge among the wise' - do you think the wise are disagreeing? You need to hear and understand from this rebuke too!" "You have blemished the mind!" "This word greatly pleased Rebbe Natan, was this not the first Torah he heard from our Rebbe." "Every word that emerged from our Rebbe, or from the mouth of Rebbe Natan, or from the great Anash who were men of truth, even if it is not written in a book, I need to think: 'Why am I hearing this'? If I hear it, then they mean me!" "Listen well to the word, it concerns you too, if not then you would not have heard it. This word was said by Rebbe Avraham b"r Nachman in connection to a matter that greatly bothered him.., I do not want to mention names of people, they were very proper people, very great. There was a very delicate matter there." ,Rebbe Shmuel Shapira z"l, in many things did not agree with me, but it was not noticeable at all! We did not harm each other even in the slightest hint! There are many proper people who do not agree with each other, but it should not be noticeable in anything. Everyone must engage in their affairs to be close to Hashem - one must see to continue together both spiritually and materially!" "There were in Uman righteous and great Jews, I do not want to detail their names. And there was a matter there that did not please me. But, it does not mean that one intends entirely for truth and the other entirely for falsehood, it is forbidden to say this. He is he and I am I.., we should never fight." "Our Rebbe says there in Torah 5: 'If I hear how they disagree and quarrel and one of them begins to fall in my eyes, it is a sign that your mind is not complete! This is a rebuke for your mind! Because otherwise, you would not have heard it." "I remember when I came to Eretz Yisrael there were the disputes of Meron and Jerusalem regarding Rosh Hashanah, terrible!" "I arrived in 5709 and it was Rosh Hashanah of 5710, such words that were going on there.., I was a new person, so I withdrew to some corner and wept bitterly: Master of the Universe, is it pleasing to Rabbi Shimon that such words are spoken? Is it pleasing to our Rebbe that such words are spoken?" "The disputants there were both proper Jews, both were accustomed to rising at midnight! But, one thought the other was entirely false.., and that is not okay! I do not agree with him? But so-and-so is a proper person and intends for truth.." "Rebbe Shmuel Shapira z"l held this way, he never spoke about the other. He was accustomed to travel to Meron and we were accustomed to come and part from each other with love and friendship! I was accustomed to give him redemption money and he was accustomed to give me redemption money like one soul!" "He traveled to Meron, I remained in Jerusalem, and we were accustomed to mention each other - and this is the true way! Because in disputes, each one harms the other and already a type of words enters that may be forbidden." "Our Rebbe speaks that emunah (faith) is prayer and a person thinks to himself: our Rebbe does not mean me, our Rebbe means those far away. But, no! If our Rebbe says it, then he means me!" "There were among us only a few people who knew and felt this. There were such elders who would cry out at the grave of our Rebbe with loud voices! Rebbe Yisrael from Terevitz z"l, an elder and a righteous man, and he cried out at the grave of our Rebbe: 'See a poor man like me! Like me! With such cries." "How did he cry out such cries? He was a proper Jew in his youth and certainly in his old age, but if one knows that our Rebbe wanted this, and this is the way of our Rebbe - one can even at the age of 90 cry out: See a poor man like me!" "Terrible, terrible what a righteous Jew he was and nevertheless he cried: 'See a poor man like me'! One must know, a word from our Rebbe pertains to everyone according to their value, if I hear it - they mean me too!" "So too regarding the conversations, if you need to hear, you will already know and hear the conversation." "May Hashem have mercy on us that we merit to remember that we have Rebbe Nachman, and our Rebbe only wanted that each one should draw themselves to the truth - which is called 'simplicity and sincerity', each one according to their value, and then he is already a completely different person, a different essence." "There were in Uman two great and proper people, one was a great practitioner of Hitbodedut. He had three rooms in his house and one room was closed, no one entered it, it was a room only for serving Hashem. His prayer was sweeter than honey, truly a child of our Rebbe. He was accustomed to go to the grave of our Rebbe.., his Tikkun HaKlali there.., his Shaarei Tzion.., his chapters of Tehillim, terrible, terrible." "The second practitioner was a different type of proper Jew, a different type of service of Hashem. There were times when there was a soul love between them, until the adversary entered and caused separation. For me, no one became small, both remained great even though they did not agree." "We asked Rebbe Avraham: both have Hitbodedut, so how? He answered: Hitbodedut, when I ask Hashem about such a matter, I need to have doubt about myself, to fear that perhaps so-and-so is right? Perhaps I am not so right? But, with them, it was different, each one held that he was completely right, and consequently all their Hitbodedut went in this direction!" "In such a situation, there cannot be true Hitbodedut, Hitbodedut in which a person is completely nullified to the will of Hashem and says: 'Master of the Universe, lead me with your truth, I know nothing'. This is a terrible idea that Rebbe Avraham b"r Nachman told us here!" "May Hashem help us with long days and years, that we begin to obey our Rebbe and enter his room like a newborn baby!" We must thank Hashem that we have such a true and compassionate leader! He only wants from us: hold yourselves together, and draw yourselves to the truth and each one should stand in his place!