The Secret of Absolute Nullification: The Path to Sweetening the Judgments and Removing the Barriers
Shiur No. 108 | Wednesday, Parashas Ki Savo, 15 Elul 5757
An in-depth article on the difference between hisbodedus (secluded prayer) of arrogance and hisbodedus of true nullification. The Rav explains this based on the teachings of the Maharal.
The Torah relates that when Moshe Rabbeinu came to Pharaoh and threw down his staff, the sorcerers did the same. The Midrash reveals the absolute truth to us: even four- and five-year-old children in Egypt threw down sticks. Moshe Rabbeinu saw this and did not understand why people were following him. He said to himself, "Hashem spoke to me? He also spoke to Bilaam! I came to Egypt, I threw down a stick, and all the children threw down sticks. I do not understand what Hashem wants from me."
Moshe Rabbeinu had many questions. He asked Hashem, "Why are You sending me and not someone else? Why not send Rabbi Akiva in my place?" Moshe was not naive, but one thing is certain—he was not a deceiver. He did not trick people, he did not seek false publicity, and he did not look to establish a court of Chassidim for himself. He spoke the truth exactly as it was.
The Danger of Arrogant Hisbodedus
There is an improper way of hisbodedus, where a person only becomes increasingly inflated with pride. He secludes himself and thinks, "I am the most important, I am the greatest tzaddik, there is no one like me in the entire world. I have mesiras nefesh (self-sacrifice), so why do I only receive slaps and kicks?" From such hisbodedus, he comes to anger and strictness. Such a person feels that "the whole earth is filled with his glory"; he grows and inflates until there is no room left for him in the entire space.
Such hisbodedus certainly cannot sweeten any judgment. True hisbodedus is when a person comes to the realization: "I do not exist. I am just some Bilaam. Hashem spoke to me? He also spoke to Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite." He understands that he does not exist at all.
Awe is Not an Acquisition – Awe is Nullification
The Maharal of Prague explains that this is the secret of awe. The Torah says:
"And now, Israel, what does Hashem your God ask of you, but to fear [Him]"
What is this awe? The Maharal explains that awe is different from all other character traits. Wisdom, strength, humility, and even the love of Hashem—all of these are considered an "acquisition of virtue." A person attains wisdom, he acquires humility, he loves Hashem. But awe is not an acquisition. Awe is absolute nullification—the state in which a person views himself as if he does not exist at all.
Moshe Rabbeinu held the level of "And what are we" (v'nachnu mah). He never felt that he existed. When people insulted him, he said, "I have not even been born yet, so who were they talking about? Who did they insult? I do not exist at all." In true awe of Hashem, there is no acquisition, there is nothing to acquire, because the person simply is not there.
Sweetening the Judgments at Their Root
According to what is explained in Likutey Moharan (Torah 52), we sometimes find ourselves in very difficult situations where the attribute of strict judgment strikes, and specifically the most righteous, holy, and pure people are taken from us. The reason for this is that we did not perform the proper unification (yichud).
The only way to sweeten the judgments from upon the Jewish people is through an hour of true hisbodedus. The hour that sweetens the judgments is only the hour in which a person knows that he is worth nothing and considers himself as nothing in his own eyes. One must toil and increase his hisbodedus until nothing remains of him, until he merits true nullification. And when he truly merits nullification, his soul is then included in its root.
Arrogance as a Separating Barrier
The person himself, with his body and his arrogance, is the barrier between himself and the Divine abundance. In the book Chayei Moharan, it is brought that everyone must think that he is the barrier preventing the abundance from reaching the Jewish people. Hashem wants to pour abundance and salvations into the world, but a person's arrogance creates a separating barrier.
Rebbe Nachman brings a parable of a king who became angry with his son and distanced him. The son tried to appease the king again and again, but the king refused and pushed him away. Finally, the king placed his beloved friend between himself and his son. The friend stood there and realized, "I am actually the barrier! I am the partition between the son and the king!" Immediately, the friend went and appeased the king himself.
So too, each one of us must know: "I am the partition between Hashem and the Jewish people. My arrogance is the separating barrier." Even the slightest thought of arrogance, when a person thinks he has a superior virtue over his friend, creates a terrible barrier.
Sometimes a person thinks he is inspiring and advancing others, but out of so much arrogance and haughtiness, he is actually paralyzing them. He causes the other person to fall into despair and think, "I am worth nothing, I do not have these talents." Arrogance is destructive; it burns every good portion and prevents people from developing and discovering their strengths. Only when a person truly believes that he is the one preventing the abundance, and recognizes his own nothingness, will his arrogance be broken, and he will merit true humility and the opening of all the gates of abundance.
Part 1 of 2 — Lesson No. 108
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