The Secret of Diminishment and the Cry: The Path to Attaining the Or Ein Sof (Infinite Light)

Lesson No. 4 | *Sunday, Parshas Emor, 1st of Iyar 5755 (1995) *Monday, Parshas Emor, 1st of Iyar 5755 (1995)
This discourse deals with the greatness of spiritual service specifically from a sense of lack and miut hamochin (diminished intellect). The Rav explains how the cry of the baal teshuvah (penitent) and persistence in prayer within a minyan (prayer quorum), even when there is no desire or understanding, build vessels for a sublime Divine light that cannot be attained through regular human intellect.
A person needs to reach a state where his soul cries and weeps on its own. It should yearn for long prayers, for praying in a minyan and in the yeshivah (Torah academy), to the point that he doesn't want to go home. Sometimes a person asks himself: "What is the point of praying in a minyan if I have no kavanah (intention)? I'm just mumbling anyway, so maybe it's better to pray at home or in the shtieblach (small prayer rooms)?"
But the truth is that within the minyan, your heart and mind will suddenly open without you knowing how it happened. The crying and shouting of the public around you open the spiritual channels. This is the secret of tzniut (modesty) that Rabbi Nosson speaks of, based on the Holy Zohar:
"The moon asked to be completely hidden, so that no one would see her work... The tzaddik (righteous person) does not want people to know he is doing anything, that he is crying out to Hashem; he is completely hidden."
The Virtue of Crying Over the Withdrawal of Intellect
The aspect of tzniut is that a person needs to cry and weep to Hashem specifically over the histalkus hamochin (withdrawal of intellect), over the lack of desire and the absence of will. Sometimes there is no desire to pray or to get up in the morning. The birds and animals rise at dawn and sing to Hashem, and a person must learn from them. If you have no desire to get up, ask someone to roll you out of bed—the main thing is to stand in the minyan.
Even if you are standing by the shtender (lectern) and just swaying, without knowing what you are saying—do not give up. If a person stands up to this test, he will eventually merit an intellect and a will that no one else possesses. The greater the histalkus (withdrawal), the more immense the light that follows it will be.
The Vessels for the Or Ein Sof (Infinite Light)
Hashem orchestrates things so that sometimes a person feels he has no "brain" and no desire, and everyone sees his embarrassment. This is the meaning of the verse:
"Walk modestly with your God"
Specifically through this humiliation and behaving with hatzne'a (modesty) and in secret, a person builds vessels to attain a sublime intellect that cannot be reached in any other way. Hashem gives everyone light according to their intellect, and to create a larger intellect that can receive the Or Ein Sof (Infinite Light) without being "burned," a person must pass through the aspect of miut halevanah (the diminishment of the moon).
Hashem takes away a person's intellect so that he will begin to cry and weep, and then he receives a new intellect that has never been revealed before. This is the secret of the Malchus (Kingship/the lowest Sefirah) which rises all the way to the Ein Sof (Infinite) specifically when it is at its peak of diminishment.
The Importance of Prayer in the Place of Study
There is supreme importance in praying specifically in the yeshivah where a person learns. Do not look for shortcuts or "fast" minyanim. Arrive early, do Hisbodedus (secluded prayer), say Tehillim (Psalms) and the Korbanos (sacrificial offerings section) slowly.
It is told of Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Lelov that he would wash his hands for half an hour, because he knew that in netilat yadayim (washing of the hands) lies the secret of pidyon (redemption of the soul). There are tzaddikim who say one blessing for fifteen minutes. Prayer is the foundation, and it must not be belittled.
"If your wife is short" – The Depth of a Woman's Understanding
Our Sages say in Tractate Berachos: "If your wife is short—bend down and whisper to her." There is a deep hint here: the lower or smaller something appears, the more intellect is hidden within it. Scientists say that shorter people live longer, and the spiritual reason is that the mind and heart are close to each other, and the flow between them works continuously.
So too regarding the woman—she has binah yetirah (extra understanding) and extra cleverness. A husband should let his wife manage the household affairs so that he can be free for study.
Gladdening the Groom and Removing Every Trace of Sadness
The Gemara asks why we say "a beautiful and graceful bride" and do not praise the groom in this way. The reason is that the groom is often in pain and worried about the future. The role of those who gladden him is to remove every trace of sadness from his heart.
Whoever succeeds in removing the sadness from the groom merits "five voices" and the Giving of the Torah. This joy is the highest thing in the world, because it allows a person to ascend to the upper Heichalos (Palaces)—as the word Kallah (bride) has the same letters as Heichal (Palace).
The Cry of the Baal Teshuvah
The Holy Zohar praises the baalei teshuvah (penitents). One who feels he has no "vessels," who never saw a Shabbat or a Seder night in his life, must cry out to Hashem like an "SOS."
"Fortunate are these baalei teshuvah... for their cries raise them up to the Sefirah of Binah (Understanding)."
A tzaddik born into holiness might pray and sing out of habit, and therefore he only rises to the Sefirah of Yesod (Foundation). But the baal teshuvah, who feels he is drowning, cries from the depths of his heart and pierces all the heavens.
Even one born in a Haredi (ultra-Orthodox) home must be a baal teshuvah—crying to Hashem not to fall into habit, singing Shabbat zemiros (songs) with dveikus (cleaving to God) to enliven his children. A family that does not sing Shabbat songs—their children will look for vitality in foreign places. The father must show his children vitality and prayer, and in the merit of these cries and weeps, we will merit the complete Geulah (Redemption) speedily in our days.
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