Why Do We Even Get Married?

Baruch Hashem, many weddings with the esteemed tzaddik Rabbi Eliezer Berland shlit"a have taken place since the conclusion of the Three Weeks of Bein HaMetzarim. The Rabbi shlit"a conducts the kiddushin and often stays to bring simcha (joy) to the bride and groom. However, over the years, our teacher Rav Berland shlit"a has spoken clear and sharp words regarding the purpose of the very sacred and important covenant of marriage. Here are words that Rav Berland shlit"a said on the eve of Shabbat Eikev after the morning prayer.

"Rabbi Natan writes (Likutei Halachot, Shabbat 6, section 23) that there is nothing to rejoice about at a wedding and that it is a mistake to dance at weddings. What are you happy about having a wife? At least learn with her for three hours, because without that, what else is there to do for three hours with a wife? It is written, 'See life with the woman' (Ecclesiastes 9:9), the husband must bring life to his wife - life, learn with her every day for three hours. The husband must learn with her Likutei Halachot, these are all simple things, if not, there is nothing to rejoice about at a wedding."

"What are you happy about? That you have a wife? So you have a few more kilos of flesh! Another little bit of kishkes (intestines), another eighty kilos of flesh, if you don't learn Torah with her, there is nothing to be happy about, only if from this will come the King Mashiach."

"If everything is in kedushah (holiness) and without desire. It is written, 'Kivrot HaTaavah' (Deuteronomy 9:22), they were buried in desire, a person buries himself in desire and this is essentially the sin. Fine, you have desire, what can be done? But you bury yourself in desire intentionally, you enter into desire with all your 248 limbs and 365 sinews, you enter into desire with force - for this Hashem does not forgive, so children come out not good, who do not want to learn, do not want to pray, and connect with bad friends, all because a person buries himself in desire."

"A person thinks that desire is permitted, desire is strictly forbidden and has no permission. What a person has are the needs of the body, a little to eat and sleep, for this there are no claims against him, but the rebuke is for the fact that the person buries himself in desire. Moshe said to them, you buried yourselves in desire, this is desire for the eyes, fine they ate from the Tree of Knowledge, but to bury yourself - for this Hashem does not forgive."

More from the holy insights from the Sheva Brachot celebration of the grooms, Shmuel Izek, son of Rabbi Natan Rubinstein, grandson of the esteemed tzaddik Rabbi Eliezer Berland shlit"a. And also for the groom Nachman, son of Rabbi Chaim Reicher shlit"a, great-grandson of Rav Berland. [gallery size="full" link="file" ids="12890,12891,12892,12893,12894,12895,12896,12897,12898,12899,12900,12901,12902,12903,12904,12905,12906,12907,12908,12909,12910"] Photos courtesy of Aharon Solomonovich