The Secret of the Difficulty in Holiness: Why Do True Mitzvot Require Mesirus Nefesh (Self-Sacrifice)?
Lesson No. 95 | * Motzaei Shabbos Parshas Shlach, the Eve of 24 Sivan 5757 - Melaveh Malkah for fundraisers at the home of the Rav in the Old City walls
An inspiring Ma'amar (discourse) from Rabbi Eliezer Berland shlit"a
A person who merits a wife who is in the aspect of "a woman of valor is the crown of her husband," a woman who encourages and strengthens him for the sake of Heaven like Devorah the Prophetess, merits to increase the light of Torah in Israel. Our goal is simple: that our children and grandchildren will put on tefillin and keep Shabbos. Even if it seems that they are not accepted anywhere, and they are even shamed and rejected—specifically from there, greatness will sprout.
Our Sages say:
"Be careful with the children of the poor, for from them Torah will emerge."
The Torah does not necessarily emerge from those of distinguished lineage, from the wealthy, or from the important. The Torah emerges specifically from those whose hearts are broken, from those who are shamed. Through them, the vessels are created to receive so much Torah, until they become the greatest geniuses.
The Power of Baalei Teshuvah (Returnees to the Faith)
We find with Othniel ben Kenaz, that he wanted to establish students who would learn his teachings. Who did they send him from Heaven? The sons of Yisro, the converts. Why didn't they send him the veterans from the tribes? Because each of the veterans already has his own tradition and habits—one is used to praying at ten, the other at twelve, and it is difficult to change them.
It is impossible to establish a true community, one that rises for Chatzos (midnight lamentation) and engages in Hisbodedus (secluded personal prayer) as written in the holy books, with people who are fixated on their habits. The true building can only be started with baalei teshuvah (returnees to the faith), who have no prior tradition and are searching for the truly authentic sources. With them, Othniel ben Kenaz established the Nation of Israel, and with them, the land was quiet for forty years.
The Danger of Despair on the Path to Holiness
The greatest stumbling block on the path is despair. Sometimes a person goes out to take action, to collect funds for a holy cause or to bring distant Jews closer, and he runs around for a whole week from Dan to Beersheba, only to return home empty-handed. The wife, who remained at home with mesirus nefesh (self-sacrifice) with the children and the burden, might fall into despair and ask: "What is all this for? Why is this happening to me?"
We must know that the moment our Matriarch Rivka said, "Why is this happening to me," she lost the Twelve Tribes at that very moment. Hashem wanted to give her all the tribes and Mashiach ben David, but because of this question, she received Esav. Even a person as pure and refined as Rivka, as long as they are within a material body, needs to be purified and not fall into despair in the face of difficulties.
They Threw the Mitzvah Back in My Face
A person wants to see immediate success, for everything to go smoothly and easily. But the truth is that a true mitzvah requires dedication. It is told of Rabbi Yonasan Eybeschutz that he gave ten thousand rubles to save a friend who was sentenced to death. That friend, before fleeing, hid all his treasure in Rabbi Yonasan's cellar, but unfortunately, he drowned in the frozen river during his escape.
When Rabbi Yonasan returned and heard about this, he found his cellar full of gold and silver. Instead of rejoicing, he began to cry bitterly and tear his hair out: "They threw the mitzvah back in my face! Yesterday I gave ten thousand rubles, and here I received sacks of gold. I wanted a pure mitzvah, and here I have received my reward immediately."
The Secret of the City's Rav: Why Does a Mitzvah Come with Difficulty?
In this context, another story is brought from Rabbi Avraham Sternhartz. Once, soldiers were leading two Jews to be hanged at the edge of the city. The Jews in the city cried out and asked how they could redeem them. The officer demanded an enormous bribe of ten thousand rubles by seven o'clock in the evening. The entire city mobilized with tremendous mesirus nefesh (self-sacrifice). People gave their last pennies, and within a few hours, by half-past six, almost the entire amount had been collected. Only fifty rubles were missing.
The community activists decided to give the city's Rav the merit of the mitzvah and approached him. The Rav entered his room, but ten minutes passed, then a quarter of an hour, and he did not come out. The tension reached its peak. At a quarter to seven, the door suddenly burst open, and the Rav cried out: "Take ten strong young men from the yeshiva immediately with iron bars, travel to the forest, and start beating the officer and the soldiers mercilessly!"
Despite their astonishment, the activists obeyed. When they began to beat the soldiers, the latter cried out: "Stop! We will reveal the truth to you! It is all a conspiracy. These Jews are not sentenced to death; they lured us into staging the arrest in order to extort money from the merciful community, and they intended to split the loot with us."
When they returned to the Rav and asked him in amazement whether he had merited Giluy Eliyahu (the revelation of Elijah the Prophet), the Rav replied: "Neither Giluy Eliyahu nor prophecy, but rather a received tradition in my hands: A matter of a true mitzvah must proceed with great difficulty. A person must spit out his lifeblood to merit a mitzvah. When I saw that the money was collected with such speed and such ease, I immediately understood that this was the work of the Satan and not a true mitzvah."
Every matter of holiness involves tests, delays, humiliations, and self-sacrifice. Only when one overcomes all these difficulties without despairing does one know that it stems from holiness, and then one truly merits the genuine reward and an enduring edifice.
Part 1 of 2 — Lesson No. 95
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