The Secret of the Shechinah in the Home: The Tremendous Power of the Mitzvah of Honoring Parents

Lesson No. 41 | * Lessons at the holy gravesite of Rebbe Nachman in Uman, 26 Elul 5755. * Tzom Gedaliah 5756.

Rebbe Nachman reveals to us that the physical mother is actually the embodiment of the holy Shechinah (Divine Presence) within the home. A fascinating article on the secret of the human soul, the reaction of the nations of the world to the Ten Commandments, and the mesirus nefesh (self-sacrifice) of the Torah giants of Israel for the sake of the mitzvah of honoring one's father and mother.

Rebbe Nachman reveals to us that "Mother" is the holy Shechinah in all Her glory. On the holiday of Sukkos, the Shechinah clothes Herself in the s'chach (the thatched roof of the Sukkah) and shelters us, exactly like a mother who shelters and protects her children. The holy Zohar states that the Shechinah descends below, into the Sukkah and into the home. This Shechinah brings another soul and yet another soul into the world—every child is a new soul.

The soul, for its part, does not want to be here on earth. What does it have to do in this world? Drink Cola? Drink Tempo (a popular Israeli soda)? It has absolutely no desire for this; it is only the body that craves these physical desires. A person who understands this already despises the body that tempts him toward negative and immodest things, and he desires only the soul. However, if the soul were without a body, it would return straight to Heaven and would not remain here for even a second. Therefore, it must be tied to the earth with ropes—and these ropes are the body.

To keep the soul in this world, Hashem, may He be blessed, gave us a mother. A mother is simply the Shechinah. Everyone has the Shechinah in their home, and he is the son of the Shechinah. A person must believe that his mother is not merely a physical figure of hands and feet, but the holy Shechinah Herself residing in his home, and it is She who drew his soul down into the world.

Living Seventy Years for a Single Mitzvah

The Tanna D'Vei Eliyahu says that if a person merely honors his mother, and everything she says is holy to him—this is a tremendous merit. Rabbi Pinchas of Koritz zt"l says in his book "Imrei Pinchas" that sometimes a person lives seventy years in this world just for a single mitzvah. Just to say one good word or make one good gesture for the sake of Hashem, may He be blessed.

Today, the most important mitzvah is that every child honors his mother. If he honors her, she will live long days and years, until a hundred and twenty.

The Zohar and Tanna D'Vei Eliyahu compare this to a king who had a good friend, an exceedingly wealthy billionaire. Before the wealthy man's passing, he thought: To whom will I give all this money? He had a young child of ten. If he gave him all the wealth, the child would squander it all in a single day. What did the father do? He deposited all the money with the king, who was wealthy in his own right and would not steal from him.

The child grew up and heard rumors, but the matter was kept secret so that he would not come to the king every day and ask for money for trips and extravagances. When the child grew up and came to the king, the king said to him: "My son, may you be blessed. May you have satisfaction in the world. Tell me, did you honor your father and your mother when you were a child? Did you always listen to their voices and do what they told you?"

It is forbidden to ever say "no" to a father and mother. When they call, one must drop everything—the homework, the games, the activities—and run immediately. Do not say, "Wait, I'm in the middle of something." If the son answers the King: "Whenever my father or mother called me, I came immediately. I left everything and ran like an arrow from a bow to do their will," the King (Hashem) says to him: "If so, come and I will show you what your father and mother left for you." Then they bring him into treasuries and vaults filled with diamonds and precious stones.

When the Blessings Chase After You

When a person honors his parents, the verse is fulfilled in him:

"And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you."

The blessings will literally chase after him and overtake him. Sometimes a person experiences curses—he falls, gets scratched, suffers blows and troubles. It all stems from the fact that he does not listen to his father and mother. But if he listens to their voices, the blessings will run after him faster than he can run, until he will not be able to contain the abundance of blessings.

The verse continues: "If you listen to the voice of Hashem your God." What does it mean to listen to the voice of Hashem? This is the fifth commandment of the Ten Commandments: "Honor your father and your mother." To listen to what Hashem wants is simply to listen to the voices of one's father and mother. This is all that Hashem wants from us.

The Reaction of the Nations of the World to the Ten Commandments

The Talmud in Tractate Kiddushin relates that when the nations of the world heard the Ten Commandments, they heard them in all seventy languages. When they heard, "I am Hashem your God," they thought to themselves: "What an arrogant one He is! He only wants them to honor Him and remember that He took them out of Egypt."

When they heard, "You shall have no other gods," they wondered: "Why does He care if there are other idols? Why hate other idols?" When they heard, "You shall not take the name of Hashem your God in vain," they said: "We have never seen such arrogance, that it is forbidden to even mention His name casually." And when they heard, "Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy," they thought it was cruelty to forbid work and enjoyment for one day a week.

But suddenly they heard: "Honor your father and your mother." No idol in the world says this. On the contrary, idol worshippers would take their elderly parents and burn them to the Molech. When the nations heard that Hashem commands to honor one's parents until a hundred and twenty, immediately all the kings took off their crowns and admitted that this is a Torah of truth.

The Chasam Sofer zt"l explains why in "Perek Shirah" (the Song of Creation), it is specifically the mule that recites the verse:

"All the kings of the earth shall thank You, Hashem, for they have heard the words of Your mouth."

The custom of kings was to ride on mules. In the middle of their horse races and pursuits, suddenly the voice of the Ten Commandments was heard. The whole world trembled; no bird chirped and no fowl flew. The kings, riding on their mules, heard the first commandments and thought it was arrogance and cruelty. But when they heard, "Honor your father and your mother," they laid down their crowns and said: "This is a true God! Fortunate is the nation that has it so." And the mules heard all of this, which is why they are the ones who sing this verse.

The Mesirus Nefesh (Self-Sacrifice) of the Torah Giants of Israel

The Talmud in Kiddushin brings wondrous examples of honoring parents. Rabbi Abbahu, one of the greatest Amoraim, told of his son Avimi. Avimi had five grown sons, all ordained rabbis. Despite this, when he would hear his father knocking on the door, he did not allow any of his children to open it. He would run to the door himself, shouting the whole way: "Father, I am opening it! Father, I am coming!" in order to spare his father even a single second of distress and waiting.

Once, Rabbi Abbahu asked for a cup of water. By the time Avimi brought the water, his father had fallen asleep. What did Avimi do? He did not go about his business; rather, he stood and leaned over his father for a long hour with the cup of water in his hand, waiting for him to wake up, so that the moment he opened his eyes he would be able to drink. In the merit of this mesirus nefesh (self-sacrifice), tremendous novel Torah insights were revealed to Avimi at that very hour, the likes of which had never been revealed before.

Another example is the Tanna Rabbi Tarfon, who was one of the Kohanim of the Holy Temple. When his mother needed to climb into her high bed, and she lacked a footstool, Rabbi Tarfon would lie down on the ground and ask her: "Mother, step on me." And when she needed to get down, he would lie down again so she could step down onto him.

We have seen such devotion to honoring parents among the tzaddikim of Chassidus as well. It is told of Rabbi Dovid of Lelov zt"l that when he was a youth, he ran away to study under the Chozeh of Lublin zt"l. When he returned, his father was very angry and looked for a stick to hit him. Rabbi Dovid did not run away; instead, he went himself, found the stick, and handed it to his father: "Father, here is the stick, hit me as much as you want." This is how one merits to become a great tzaddik—through absolute self-nullification and lovingly accepting the will of one's parents.

Part 2 of 4 — Lesson No. 41

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